Ye olde coffee shoppe
My local coffeeshop has a new employee: an attractive, smiling, blonde, British lady. I wanted to make the right impression so I ordered thusly, “Oi! I’ll have a raspberry scone, you wanker! Amy Winehouse! Kate Moss! Occupying India!”
I think we made a real connection because she gracefully served me an espresso shot to the face and then said to her co-worker, “This is the fifth time this morning he’s said that to me. Can you get him out of here?” in the cutest English accent!
